Take The Life As It Presents To You

On the airplane from Frankfurt to Singapore I was sitting right to a woman whose smell I could not stand. So I talk to myself, if you can not change the situation, enjoy it. I start to smile and begin to enjoy the smell. It was not too bad. Yes, it was not I wished, but it is a very specific smell. So take it as it is.

In this moment the guy sitting in front of me asked if I would like to change the seat with him, since he wanted to sit next to his friend who is on the left seat of mine. And I pleasantly accepted the offer and was released from all the feeling with the smell.

I changed the seat and was sitting next to a young and attractive woman who lived in Australia where other people spend their vacation. She just needs to walk over the street to reach the beach. We had an enjoyable conversation. When I arrived in Singapore I asked her to join us in the news group “Glückliche Arbeitswelt” (happy working world) at XING. She happily accepted. 

Take the life as it presents to you, then you will always be able to enjoy it.

Everything Is Easy

My guitar teacher once told me: „If you practice guitar correctly, it should be easy and it should not take long hours. Why? If you practice in a wrong way, the more you practice the more difficult for you to unlearn the bad habits.“

When I think back, I realize that all the major mile stones in my life were coming without any struggles:

1. I was nominated for a university exchange program to Germany without any efforts from my side.

2. I got my first job without lengthy recruiting process. I contacted a former PhD student of my PhD Professor. And that was it.

3. I met my wife coincidently in my friend apartment in Cologne. I wrote her a letter. Few years later we got married, until today, 25 years later.

4. The chance to go back to Shanghai as Expatriate came without any efforts from my side.

In contrast I put a lot of efforts, energy in some projects which did not succeed as I would have wished. My conclusion is, if you do the things in the right way, it should be easy. It should come naturally to success.

When I observe how people work in some companies, I found out that people who work long hours and unhappy are usually people who often create cost of non-quality. They try to fight in all fronts and try to maximise ambiguous benefits. It is doubtable that they create more value overall for the company and for the customers than other people in the company.

Life should be easy, if your mind, body and soul are in perfect alignment.
Life should be easy, if you extend your boundary as broader as you can image.
Life should be easy, if you have complete clarify about what you want to achieve.
Life should be easy, if you are certain that you will eventually achieve your goals.
Life should be easy, if you live your passion and dreams.
Life should be easy, if you take time to enjoy it.
Life should be easy, if you love everything around you including yourself.

Laughter at Youtube

Have you ever thought that Youtube could be a fantastic market research tool? I am interested in success training and checked the videos of some renowned trainers. To my surprise the clicks of the top videos of top success speakers are between 100,000 to 1,500,000 compared to some top adult videos with clicks between 1,000,000 to 10,000,000.

I am also interested in videos about meditation. There the clicks are between 100,000 to 1,000,000, so similar range as success trainings. If I look at classic guitar the best videos got 1,000,000 to 10,000,000 clicks.

Now guess what is the most click video I ever found on Youtube? It was a baby laughing with more than 94,000,000 clicks. The video is titled Hahaha. This brings me to an idea of business: get people to laugh or get people to be happy :-)

Three Dimensions of Luxury

When people talk about Luxury, they usually talk about money and all the nice, expensive things money can buy: cars, jewelleries, houses, resorts, yachts, cigars, champagnes, golf clubs and parties. Money is really a good thing. However it is just one dimension of luxury.

The second dimension of the luxury is the time. People who have money, but no time to enjoy the life, because they have to spend all their time to earn the money, are actually poor people. Real luxury therefore starts with abundance of time. Women understand it better than man. They sometime just take hours shopping, not necessarily to buy anything, but to enjoy the time.

The third dimension of the luxury is the emotional freedom. You are free to go to an expensive restaurant, but also free to choose to go McDonalds for a junk food. You are free to get close to a friend, but also free to be happy without him or her. You are free from any negative emotions, but also free to accept them, when they are there occasionally. You are emotional independent from your spouse and kids, but free to love them deeply. You are free to make your boss or customer successful, but also free to leave them, if you decide to.

When you reach all three dimensions of luxury, then there is nothing you will regret when the time comes for you to leave the world, with an eternal smile on your face, completely free.

The Perspective of a Wise Man

Yesterday night I happened to meet an old friend here in Singapore. I remember that we have not met for more than four years. He was happy, relaxed and in three weeks he will reach an important mile stone: turning to 50. A big party was planned in Phuket, Thailand with more than 30 people from different continents of the world.

The last time I met him he was at a critical point to decide the next career steps. There were two options to choice:

1) To go to a small size company with higher and more challenging responsibilities. The risk factor would also be bigger.

2) To go to a bigger company with smaller responsibilities and doing similar job as before. The risk factor would be smaller.

He talked about those two real options in full details and said: “I did not make up my mind clear yet, but I still have two weeks time to think about it.”

Then he stopped talking. I realized that he actually asked my options without directly asking. He was very successful and determined. Probably he was too proud to ask. At that moment I knew how to give him advice without hurting his feelings.

I said: “My friend, let me ask you a question. Suppose you are now at age 60 and you are very successful in every aspects of your life.” His eyes radiated and I got his attention. “When you look back, how would you (old and wise) judge the decision of the young man at his life transforming moment? For which decision he would feel more proud, more satisfied and happier?”

My friend smiled and I knew that he made a decision in his mind.

Merci, 谢谢, Danke, Thanks

From the amazing book The Secret by Rhonda Byrne I learnt an important aspect of life I should never underestimate: the gratitude.

So I thought it is the right time for me to express my sincere thanks to you, my dear reader. You are not just some one from France, China, Germany, USA and many other countries. You are a very special person whom I feel connected with, not only through the internet, but also mentally, emotionally and spiritually, because I am a strong believer that there is no coincidence.

I am grateful that my texts have value for you, I am grateful that the internet, google, blog, Personal Computer and telecommunications made all these possible that you and me are connected in some way. Thanks also to all those countless people who work on these technologies.

Merci, 谢谢, Danke, Thanks!

Selective Memories: Improve Your Live Instantly

Years ago I learnt a method to improve my achievements. It is called success book. It tells you to write down every success during a day, big or small. That way you are much aware of your success. You can also create a love book or happiness book.

I know a woman who is very bright. She tells every small or big positive aspect of her life to everyone she likes, when she bought new shoes, new clothes, new jewelry, when she started to learn a new language or new music instrument, when she visited a new bar or restaurant, when she tried a new spa or ate a delicious cake.

On the other side when something negative happened to her, for example a car accident, she tried to remember the good side of it, e.g. the guy was nice or fortunately the cost of the repair was all covered by the insurance.

From above two examples I realize that maybe initially what happened did not really change. But if you emphasize the positive side of the reality, the positive side will have more weight to you. You select the things to remember you like. By any time of your life, it is not what you really have experienced, but what you can remember, will make up your (subjective) reality.

At the second stage however, when you get used to focus on the bright side of your life, your mood will be better, you will have higher energy level and you will have better judgment and make better decisions which will change your quality of live, improve your efficiency and increase your level of happiness.

Motivation Factor Number ONE: Sense of Purpose

On the way to the office this morning, I observed 2 elderly people, maybe aged at 70, standing next to the traffic light, directing the flow of the walkers crossing the street. The temperature was 31 °C. Both of them wore a sign: Volunteer.

Then I observed some young, nice dressed ladies in the air-conditioned office building with the best views to the Huangpu River, got bored for what they have to do, waiting for the clock to reach 5:30pm, so they can enjoy the night life in Shanghai.

So I start to question myself what really motivate people to work, not just to do an ordinary work, but a job with passion, independently on how much one gets paid for. I reflected to my own 23 years working experiences with all the emotional ups and downs and came to the conclusion that people need strong sense of purpose to work with passion.

For me the purposes are

1) When the work has a component of personal development, either for me or for other people.

2) When the work really creates values, either for the company, other people or for myself.

If none of the above exists, I tent to switch off my light and fire. I will still do a job well. But I may not go the extra miles.

I am pretty sure that every one has his own sense of purpose. The manager’s task is to find it out and to design the job for the subordinates such that it makes sense (of purpose) to them.

Emotional Write Offs

Are you an investor? Do you feel some times that you hold an investment too long, an investment which gets you nowhere, but you can’t just get rid of it, because it cost you already too much money, time and energy?

The same can happen with your emotional reality. Here an example. Let say you fall in love with some one who has absolutely no bridge to your emotional world. You tried to date with her, make presents, send flowers, send letters, emails, sms, make phone calls, say nice words, make compliments, take care of her where ever possible. But there is absolutely no response and no return. You get mad and can not concentrate on your work, but have to think of her, knowing with the certainty that it will get you nowhere.

What would you do? You say to yourself: “Stop. I made a terrible mistake in this emotional investment. And now I have to write off this investment.”

Close your eyes and start to imagine, that every thing from her is getting out from your body, your heart, your mind, slowly, but surely, away from you, to a far destination, that you do not know and do not care. Imagine that you can absolutely live in peace and harmony with the remaining pure YOU.

Say to her in your mind: “Good bye and good luck.”

Practice this more times, until nothing of her is left. Then you completed the write-off of your emotional investment. It is really as easy as like that.

Happiness at the Work

The essential purpose of work in the business is to make other people happy.

If you are a waiter, your clients should enjoy the dinner. If you are writer, your reader should like your text. If you are factory worker, your products, such as iPhone, laptop, shoes, pen, watches, chairs will finally reach the end customers who need or want them.

If you are manager, your job is to make your boss happy, as well as your subordinate, so that they can work on things making the end customers happy.

If the essential purpose of work in the business is to make other people happy, you can not really do a good work without being happy yourself, because your happiness or unhappiness will be eventually transferred to the end customers. The obvious example comes from service sector, when your smile makes immediate difference.

However, most people work without a sense of happiness. They just want to earn money, as much as possible, to make a living. I believe this is the largest source of unhappiness in this world.

Therefore most people really missed the point of purpose of work. Help yourself to do something about it, either by changing the job or creating a working environment that will make yourself and the people around you happy. Amen.